Nigel Clarke, a self-confessed "call centre menu enthusiast", released details of his project today on a site called www.pleasepress1.com. One of the site's users described the feat as “the biggest breakthrough this side of the Enigma machine".
After fitting in his crusade against the talking robots around a full time job, Clarke finally quit his job last year to dedicate himself to call centre cartography.
He has made more than 12,000 calls in a bid to produce maps of automated lines used by firms in Britain, some with up to 7 menu levels and 80 options. Many of these are so circuitous and confusing that phoning them is like entering the "modern equivalent of Dante’s circles of hell”, he said.
If everyone used his crib sheets to bypass the systems, Clarke insisted, Britons could save a total of one billion minutes of call time. Clarke added: "Everyone knows that calling your insurance or gas company is a pain but for most, it’s not an everyday problem. However, the cumulative effect of these calls is really quite devastating when you’re moving house or having an issue. I’ve been working in IT for over 30 years and nothing gets me riled up like having my time wasted through inefficient design. This is why I’ve devoted the best part of seven years to solving this issue.”
Clarke found that more than two-thirds of call centres also use introductions, adding an extra few annoying seconds to each call.
Source: The Register
